Should coranavirus be capitalized when writing?

The quick answer is no.

There are numerous "style guides" used by writers, editors, and scientists alike, largely created by people with too much time on their hands to come to any universal agreement. God help us if The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, and Associated Press could ever agree on punctuation or grammar. Even Buzzfeed has their own style guide. Buzzfeed. Yes, folks, we have entered that confusing moment in human development.

But here is where some of the largest style guides fall on the spelling of coronavirus.

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The Associated Press:

The Associated Press Stylebook (used by numerous journalists worldwide) states, "referring to simply the coronavirus is acceptable on first reference in stories."

They're adamant that you include "the" before "coranavirus," because--specifically speaking--there are a number of coranviruses, and COVID-19 is simply the version of coranavirus which developed in late 2019. The AP doesn't want you sounding glib and casual in your writing, so don't forget "the."

The AP's explanation also goes on to describe the family of diseases (SARS, MERS, COVID), and warns writers, "Do not exaggerate the risks presented by any of the three diseases by routinely referring to them as deadly, fatal or the like."

Key here is "routinely referring to them." The AP stresses a focus on facts. Yes, the diseases potentially are fatal, but the vast and significant majority of people survive, many without symptoms. Lack of panic doesn't attract readers and viewers, and lack of readers and viewers means lacks of advertising, which is why it appears broadcast and print media largely ignore this rule.


Chicago Manual of Style:

The Centers for Disease Control follows the Chicago Manual of Style Handbook (which is heavily favored by academic journals), and specifically links to the handbook on their site. The CDC gets bonus points for not creating their own style guide.

In essence, the CMOS Handbook limits capitalization at all cost across all forms of writing, unless the word involves a proper noun or acronym. For example, one would never capitalize "cold" or "flu" by themselves, but if referencing a certain pandemic, like the Spanish Flu, it's capitalized. Same rules apply for coronavirus.


American Medical Association Manual of Style:

Short and simple, it's largely the same as the Chicago Manual. The virus isn't capitalized; acronyms are. They could simply link to the Chicago Manual, but that would mean looking less important in the highly nuanced and petty world of style guides.

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So, in conclusion, no capitalization is needed.

Now, we all can go back to washing our hands and schlepping through another day adorned in pajama pants while questioning the merits of ice cream at 11am.

Columnist joins The New York Times, then writes how the newspaper's power might be bad news.

Point #1:  Ben Smith used to work at BuzzFeed when it was a startup company.

Point #2:  The New York Times has more digital subscribers than the COMBINED subscribers of The Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, New York Daily News, Chicago Tribune, Newsday, Boston Globe, Houston Chronicle, The Dallas Morning News, and San Francisco Chronicle.

Point #3:  Ben Smith left BuzzFeed, joined The New York Times as a columnist, and on Sunday wrote his first piece about how his now-employer's consolidation of media power might not be so good.

He joined the very problem he fears.

The New York Times has become such a monopoly of information that it can hire people to criticize the company, publish it, play it as self-aware, and simply laugh as they watch more money roll in.

Harvard Law School mistakenly listed Anthony Scaramucci as dead.

Say it with me: Only his political career is, Harvard...only his political career.

Harvard Law School released the latest printed edition of its alumni directory recently, where the former White House communications director has an asterisk beside his name. What does the asterisk mean? That Anthony Scaramucci is dead.

Harvard apologized, telling The Washington Post it was a regrettable "error" and that they'd fix the mistake in future editions.

The one small problem? Before this year, the directory was last printed six years ago. This means The Mooch might have to wait a bit before his resurrection can occur.

Speaking of Patterson, Bill O'Reilly is no longer a collaborator on children's books.

Last November, for reasons that probably have physicists, psychologists, and spiritual leaders the world over still trying to figure out, James Patterson released a children's book with former Fox News lothario Bill O'Reilly.

Titled Give Please a Chance, it focuses on one of Patterson's pet peeves: manners.

Yet, for the upcoming October 2017 release of Patterson's next book about good behavior, Give Thank You a Try, Patterson has gone it alone.

[[[GASP]]]

That's right. We're in the dawn of a new era. James Patterson actually managed to write a short story (albeit for kids) completely on his own. I know global warming is affecting weather patterns, but hell might have just frozen over as well.

The other significant matter is why Bill O'Reilly is missing from Give Thanks a Try. Was it because of the scandalous reports that got him fired from Fox News? Does O'Reilly have an aversion to graciousness and saying "thanks"? What's the story here?

The Washington Post reached out to Patterson, who refused to comment.

But when declining, did he politely say thanks?

Donald Trump doesn't read, even to kids.

When he was a running for president, then-candidate Donald Trump let the world know he didn't read books.

As The Washington Post described it--regarding if Trump ever read biographies of former presidents--he replied: "I never have. I’m always busy doing a lot. Now I’m more busy, I guess, than ever before."

The Post continued, explaining Trump's reading habits:


"Trump’s desk is piled high with magazines, nearly all of them with himself on their covers, and each morning, he reviews a pile of printouts of news articles about himself that his secretary delivers to his desk. But there are no shelves of books in his office..."


Fast forward to candidate Trump becoming President Trump, and nothing much has changed. At the annual Easter egg roll at La Casa Blanca--where presidents traditionally read to children--Trump still couldn't grab a random Dr. Seuss and take five minutes for rhyme time.

What we got was the Press Secretary--and human steam missile--Sean Spicer reading to some random child, alone, in a how-to of awkwardness:




Is that kid questioning his life decisions the entire time? Yes--yes he is.

Elsewhere, Attorney General Jeff Sessions read It's Not Easy Being a Bunny, a 39-page marathon that doesn't have much of a Wikipedia page, and goes for the low-low, moved-to-sell price of $6.01 at Barnes and Noble.

First Lady Melania Trump chose a children's book by Kathie Lee Gifford, Party Animals, to read.

First Lady Melania Trump read aloud "Party Animals" by Kathie Lee Gifford, celebrating differences & similarities in people. pic.twitter.com/yxNnASPqqE

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) April 17, 2017

According to the Amazon description:


"Successful talk show host, singer, songwriter, actress, and author Kathie Lee Gifford has come up with a delightful book for children! Lucy Goosy is carefully reviewing her list of animals to invite for her birthday party. She has to make sure to invite the right guests so that her party will be perfect. But when she focuses on everyone's bad qualities, instead of good, she discovers that there is no one to attend! With a little help from the Wise Owl..."

Okay, that's enough. I was lost after calling Kathie Lee a successful singer and songwriter. Amateur mic night at the Chuckle Hut has better creativity.

Instead, our First Lady chose a book written by a ghost writer most likely created by a morning talk show host to share at Easter. That, and it had human kamikaze, Sean Spicer, indulging in a creepy read-along with random kid alone.

Yet, nowhere was the president.

By comparison, Barack Obama routinely read books to children, and not books by television hosts:

Here is a picture of Obama reading Where The Wild Things are to some children in 2014. pic.twitter.com/94jcn8BRYH

— India Knight (@indiaknight) January 16, 2017

Admittedly, Dr. Seuss and Maurice Sendak never featured Donald Trump in a book, which explains why he doesn't read them.

This would be a missed opportunity by them. Or good sense.

'Earthling' as a word can now be capitalized. Humanity rejoices.

That's right, Martians. We're owed respect now.

The Washington Post can be thanked for clarifying one of the great injustices to humankind in, truly, the entire galaxy.

Sarah Kaplan, a science writer for the Post, was writing a story on black holes and E/earthlings, and wasn't sure what the proper spelling was--'Earthling' or 'earthling.' The problem? The dictionary the newspaper was using, a Merriam-Webster version (those rapscallions again), claimed a lowercase version was to be used. Kaplan wondered, though, why are Klingons, Vulcans, Wookies, and Martians all capitalized, but earthlings get the uppercase shaft? Why the blatant disrespect??

Post science editor Laura Helmuth reached out to Merriam-Webster via Twitter to ask what's up with subjugating humanity to submissive wording:

Question for @MerriamWebster from @WashingtonPost science desk: Why is earthling lowercase but Martian capitalized? Thanks! @SarahKaplan48

— Laura Helmuth (@laurahelmuth) April 5, 2017

The dictionary folks replied quickly, saying they were conferring...and went silent for hours. Kaplan stayed glued to her computer wondering the outcome.

After minutes turned into hours, Merriam-Webster decided to bestow honor upon the human race.

In fact, 'Earthling' now merits inclusion, at least as a variant spelling. We've made a note to update the entry. 🌎👽👍 @laurahelmuth

— Merriam-Webster (@MerriamWebster) April 5, 2017

There we have it. Humanity has risen in status. We haven't been this united as a species since we all came together to admit Kanye lost his cool three years ago.

Tests reveal that...[[[extra long dramatic pause]]]...Maury Povich is the father of the newspaper!!

Jerry Springer would never exist without Maury Povich, and Maury Povich would never exist unless vast numbers of people with poor decision making skills decided to air their dirty laundry on national television. For twenty-two years, Povich has made a career out of unruly teenagers, abusive men, polygraph tests, and revealing paternity test results. In essence, the worst dinner party guests ever. People like this guy:

Sounds legit.

Despite all of the tabloid angles to what's made Povich wealthy, he still has roots in the newspaper business. His father, after all, was the famed Washington Post columnist Shirley Povich. This has led Maury to helm a rural, out-of-the-way newspaper, nearly unknown to the public for nearly a decade.

The Flathead Beacon newspaper serves the town of Kalispell, Montana, and the accompanying Flathead County, where Povich and his wife, former news anchor Connie Chung, own a vacation home. And in an era when many newspapers around the country fold on a monthly basis, the Flathead Beacon has actually seen readership increase--and with a total lack of paternity test revelations, too!

That doesn't mean Povich is ready to quit daytime television for newspapers just yet. As he told CNN Money, "After nine years, we're almost breaking even."

Apparently people in Montana don't make nearly as many bad decisions.

Lawsuit claims teaching assistants at Amherst College were encouraged to sleep with undergrads.

There are a few things I think we all associate with Amherst, Massachusetts. Emily Dickinson, people speaking Spanish, and pure, carnal, sexual heat. And if you can picture all three of those at once, you're not only mildly disturbed, but you're envisioning a seemingly average day in the rural hinterlands of western New England.

Dimaris Barrios-Beltran is a former lecturer for Amherst College. 'Former' because she was recently let go from her position in the Spanish department after, she alleges, refusing to give into a culture of potential sex with undergraduate students to make the department look more appealing. This differs from your average English department, where wallowing in poetry while wearing Birkenstocks is par for the course. Subtle difference in cultures, to be sure.

According to the Washington Post, department supervisor Victoria Maillo is described in the suit as looking online for "pretty faces" to hire as teaching assistants in hopes of attracting more students to study Spanish.

As the Post explains:


"Early in 2013, Barrios-Beltran’s teaching assistant called her in tears, according to the lawsuit, saying that Maillo was treating her like a prostitute. The teaching assistant claimed that Maillo was angry that she was dating a student at the University of Massachusetts and told her and other teaching assistants to go to parties with students and sleep with them to encourage them to take Spanish. Barrios-Beltran claims that in frustration, the teaching assistant asked Maillo if she wanted her to sleep with a different guy every night like another teaching assistant was doing, and the teaching assistant told Barrios-Beltran that Maillo responded, 'that is what I brought you here for.'"


Amherst College claims they let Barrios-Beltran go solely because of declining enrollments. Or, if you're paying attention to this story, for exactly the same reason why Maillo is alleged to have been trying to counteract while channeling her inner madam.

In the end, both women no longer work for Amherst College. English majors? Still wallowing in poetry.

Someone will sing any Christmas song you request, 24/7, if you call this phone number.

No, really. It's entirely less creepy than it sounds.

Started in 1960 by the students from Snyder Hall at the University of Illinois, residents from the building man phones around the clock while rockin' around the Christmas tree, taking calls and requests all day, all night, to sing any holiday song you ask. They don't promise you'll get someone on the other end of the line with the pipes of Aretha Franklin or Nat King Cole--but that's sort of the charm, isn't it?

In terms of popularity, it's fairly clear which song wins. A few years ago, the singing students started a Mariah Meter in order to count how many times Mariah Carey's famed, perky, holiday earworm "All I Want for Christmas Is You" was requested. Last year it was asked for 339 times, almost as often as it can be heard during drunken holiday karaoke at Chinese food restaurants.

So if you're feeling a Christmas groove coming on at 3am during a moment of insomnia, you have until December 16th at 11:59pm to call in a request, when phones close for another year.

The number?

(217) 332-1882

Request "Good King Wenceslas" if you know what's good for you.

Him? Her? They? The Washington Post has little care for your pronoun usage.

The English language is filled with a variety of silly rules--rules you should never, never, never abide by because you're a savagely good looking and charismatic individual who wears expensive Italian suits and/or shoes and flaunts society's conventions.

This is to say I'm not against flattery, and I'm also here to twist your arm. (God, you smell great! New cologne/perfume?) Rules in the English language are largely misguided, antiquated, or outright false, rules like Never end a sentence with a preposition! or Don't split an infinitive! or Don't use an adverb with a feeling verb! (Have you done something new with your hair? It looks so full and shiny!)

Another English language 'rule' is that you should always use her/him whenever writing and a singular pronoun is called for--never, ever the plural they. Specificity is key, proponents claim, and they is gender-neutral. (Goodness, it looks like you've lost weight!)

But there are some people--usually people who are writers, who encounter pronouns by the hour ((waves!!)), writers prone to flattery--that gravitate toward the gender-vague they as a singular term. We all use it in conversation every day, so why can't it be written? (Your eyebrows smolder like George Clooney's, just sayin'.)

Writers are split on the matter. Sides are taken. Flattery gets thrown about to woo the undecided. (Your teeth are so white and perfectly straight!)

This explains why the Washington Post Style Guide is now accepting they as a singular term.The Post's copy editor, Bill Walsh, explains it's all really simple, mainly because it's "the only sensible solution to English’s lack of a gender-neutral third-person singular personal pronoun." And, I swear, half of what Walsh just said makes sense. Promise.

Once one style guide joins the fray, it's only a matter of time (or flattery) before other style guides follow suit. But you don't want to be a follower. You're a leader. A quick witted, gorgeous individual with sun-kissed skin that's just simply radiant!

GED passing rates plummet--and for prisoners most of all.

Last year, the General Educational Development (GED) structure was changed, some say to a more difficult collection of tests. Gone was the availability to take the high school equivalency exams with a pencil and paper. Now, only students with computer access were allowed to complete the process.

This change to the modern age of computer and internet availability appeared to be fine, if not outright inevitable. Yet while statistics show high school graduation rates have risen marginally, those taking the GED are not only struggling to keep up, but in many cases the number of successful graduates via the GED program is dropping--and chief amongst those struggling are prisoners.

Internet and computer availability is supremely lacking in America's prison system. Concerns about safety and the ability to monitor prisoner activity online is one concern, while on-site testing rules and the ability to train teachers are others. Meanwhile, a segment of the civilian population often views computers as a luxury item bestowed upon criminals, and thus shouldn't be supplied.

This draconian behavior of focusing on the punishment angle and not on the correctional angle is what causes a drastic likelihood that prisoners will end up back in jail. According to an NPR report, "A study by the Rand Corporation found that every dollar spent on correctional education programs saves $5 in reincarceration costs. Since the change to the more difficult test, no one has been collecting data on GED pass rates by inmates — but experts say it's clear they are down."

And, it should be noted, not just down for prisoners. In 2012, 401,388 individuals passed the GED test. in 2013, knowing the testing structure was changing, 540,535 passed the barrage of exams, creating a bump. 2014--the first year of computerized testing with the new tests--saw only an estimated 86,000 pass out of 248,000 who attempted to earn their GED. The drop-off is dramatic.

The drop-off is so dramatic--and the cost to take the tests (roughly $120) is so prohibitive to economically disadvantaged people--that some states, like New York and over a dozen others, have either dropped the GED tests or are in the process of creating their own high school equivalency exams.

Moreover, the GED is overseen by the American Council on Education (ACE), a nonprofit organization that owns the trademark on the GED. As of 2011, ACE brought in Pearson, a British company best known for their textbooks and test administration, and turned the GED into a for-profit venture. By 2014, Pearson was solely responsible for developing the test, despite ACE's oversight.

While studies show that attaining a GED typically doesn't translate into a higher economic status, it is still usually the only opportunity available to a large segment of the American population--prisoners included--to improve their life. As Stephen Steurer former executive director of the Correctional Education Association, tells NPR, "We put so many people in prison who are uneducated, and we put them there without any resources [...] We have a golden opportunity when we put people in prison to educate them."

If Steurer had his way, prison wouldn't simply be punishment; prisoners would be forced to educate themselves. "Make part of their sentence that they achieve some skills with some sort of certification that means they can get a job that pays some kind of decent wage," he says.

It's strange, isn't it? The United States has the highest rate of imprisonment in the world, and this country takes the one opportunity to "correct" these individuals in a "correctional" facility, and decides to not only eliminate that opportunity --but make it financially profitable for an international company to earn that money on the backs of the most vulnerable in this country.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.




Yes, I have experience teaching in prison. And as I said before...

Full disclosure: I have worked on educational programs through a prison. Some of the smartest, most gifted individuals I've ever known were men who committed a violent crime--often, usually, a crime of passion. A crime I could commit. A crime you could commit. A crime any of us would commit if placed in the same situation, position, or bearing in life.

And these same men I'd trust with my life, despite the fact that some might have already taken the life of another. Because they accomplished the one thing most any of you reading this cannot do--that I cannot do--and that is correct what needs correcting in ourselves.

Student refuses to pay back student loans, compares struggle to Rosa Parks.

Mallory Heiney attended the now-defunct Everest Institute, a formerly for-profit university that was under the umbrella of Corinthian Colleges. Corinthian has had a long and steady history in recent years dealing with lawsuits over alleged wrongdoing, which led to an agreement in 2014 with the Department of Education to sell 85 of its colleges and close an extra 12.

Fifteen former Corinthian students--including Heiney--have banded together to fight what they say were predatory lending, and are refusing to pay back their student debt.

But, in describing her plight, Heiney took the comparison deeper than you'd imagine, writing in a Washington Post op-ed that this fight is channeling the civil rights struggle 60-years earlier.

"While our cause is modest by comparison, we recognize that some of the greatest human rights movements in history were launched by the small acts of a few individuals," Heiney writes. "In 1955, Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat on a bus. This soon led to the revolutionary Montgomery bus boycott."

There's one small difference between student loan debt and Rosa Parks' act though: Parks was arrested. Parks risked everything. She received death threats for nearly the rest of her life.

Lenders might be predatory, but they aren't going to threaten to kill you. At least not yet.

Shakespeare First Folios are getting busy, visiting (nearly) every U.S. state and territory.

The First Folios of William Shakespeare are a relatively rare commodity. Of the 750 that were originally printed in 1623, an estimated 228 still exist in varying conditions. Containing the first printed total collection of Shakespeare's dramas, comedies, and histories, the First Folio contains thirty-six plays, including first known printings of such notable works like Macbeth, The Taming of the Shrew, and The Tempest (among others), yet most folios are incomplete. Indeed, only 40 copies remaining today are considered complete in totality.

The Folger Shakespeare Library in Washington, D.C., owns 82 First Folios and has decided, in commemoration of Shakespeare's upcoming 400th birthday in 2016, to lend out a First Folio to every state, the District of Columbia, Puerto Rico, and the U.S. Virgin Islands.

Any public institution looking to host the First Folio in its state or territory can apply to the Folger by September 5, 2014, but must meet the museum's requirements for security and environmental conditions before it will even be considered.

Folger exhibitions manager, Caryn Lazzuri, tells the Washington Post that the logistics are intense and a bit overwhelming at times. "I'm both excited and nervous about it," she tells the paper. "If something goes wrong, it's probably my fault."

Acceptance of the inevitable is always a good first start.





When did Guam become the redheaded tropical stepchild of America? How come Guam doesn't get a First Folio to bandy around? Guam is more noteworthy than the Virgin Islands. Hell, logistically, the Virgin Islands can piggyback off the First Folio Puerto Rico gets. They're all lumped together geographically in the Caribbean. But Guam? It's nearly 4,000 MILES TO THE WEST of Hawaii. And in case you haven't noticed, Hawaii exists pretty much as a landing strip in the middle of the Pacific in case your plane runs out of gas. (And it has nice beaches and whatnot.)

Guam even has more people than the Virgin Islands, roughly 50,000 more, so by comparison it's the swinging, happening hotspot of American shindigs in the western Pacific. And yet they seemingly will be denied any Shakespeare love.

Don't even get me started on American Samoa getting shafted.

Judy Blume is writing a new book.

The Washington Post is all over this. It's Blume's first adult book in sixteen years.

I'm not going to lie. I thought Judy Blume was dead. At least for a solid decade, too.

Washington Post poll: White Americans don't support paying college athletes. Non-white Americans do.

College sports is an affluent industry, where athletic conferences negotiate multi-million dollar television contracts, and the NCAA (the body overseeing collegiate sports) sees those multi-million dollar contracts--laughs--and negotiates multi-billion dollar television contracts of their own.

Indeed, colleges and universities with football and basketball programs that air on national television reap in millions in alumni donations, clamoring for the attention their schools receive--and the coaches of such programs receive bonuses that pay out hundreds of thousands of dollars for good performance (or millions sometimes). College coaches at state colleges and universities are sometimes the highest paid state employee.

Considering the revenue they generate, there's a movement for college athletes to be paid, which is why the Washington Post polled Americans to see how they feel about that prospect.

The results? Largely based upon racial lines.

According to Deadspin:


The largest split came with race: White respondents opposed paying college athletes by a 73-24 margin, while non-white respondents supported salaries for college athletes, 51-46. (Hispanics also narrowly supported paying college players.)


That racial line in America's cities, towns, politics, and religion?

Yeah, it's in its college sports, too.

Report: Americans read news headlines and not much else.

There's something about a Malaysian Airlines plane flying into Crimea, and Russia says it's going to back Rand Paul in 2016 because Obamacare caused a car accident which has shut down the highway for hours.

I think.

The dialects of American English, mapped in wavy, neon colors.

The Washington Post reposted Robert Delaney's map from back in the day to show how we Americans speak.

There are quirks. Boston, New York City, Chicago, San Francisco, and the coastal regions of South Carolina and Georgia all have tongues with linguistic uniqueness.

As does the Ozarks. On this map it's like the beauty mark of America. And just like a beauty mark, it's something you want to keep an eye on just in case it metastasizes.

Study: Poor children are the majority in public schools in America's West and South.

Hooray, America...!(?)








Hat tip to New Mexico, Kentucky, Mississippi, and Louisiana for keeping that majority poverty number running for over a decade now.

Stay classy!




Infographic: Washington Post

Study: You sometimes talk like a cave dweller.

According to a study, a number of words humans use today are strikingly similar to the linguistic patterns humanity used 15,000+ years ago, born from an Ice Age-era proto-language that has trickled down to a variety of modern languages.

Per The Washington Post:

The traditional view is that words can’t survive for more than 8,000 to 9,000 years. Evolution, linguistic “weathering” and the adoption of replacements from other languages eventually drive ancient words to extinction, just like the dinosaurs of the Jurassic era.

Except it turns out language is more like Jurassic Park, minus Sam Neil, Jeff Goldblum, or that little kid with a death wish aiming a flashlight at a T-Rex. Come on, kid, use your head--who does that?

Anywho, back to The Post:

A team of researchers has come up with a list of two dozen “ultraconserved words” that have survived 150 centuries. It includes some predictable entries: “mother,” “not,” “what,” “to hear” and “man.” It also contains surprises: “to flow,” “ashes” and “worm.”

Also making the list? The verb "to give," suggesting that--deep down--maybe humanity always has tried to be generous.

Except Ayn Rand. There was no saving her.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Rogers!

Okay, sure, Mr. Rogers is dead. But, eh, why quibble?

Today would've been his 84th birthday. In remembrance, PBS is running a documentary from a filmmaker who used to summer next door to Mr. Rogers--which goes on to explain how unbelievably flawless a human being he was. In today's media-driven, red-light saturated society, you half-expect a half-dozen illegitimate children to come forward, claiming Mr. Rogers ignored their pleas for child support because he had a jonesing for the nose candy and 30 racks of Natty Light.

But, no. Somehow, as if it's impossible for such kindness to exist in a human being, Mr. Rogers was what he was--practical low-priced sneakers and rainbow cardigans included.

So, to remember the man, here's Mr. Rogers and the famous 1969 Congressional hearings. Famous because public television was going to have its proposed $20 million dollar grant slashed in half. Famous because Mr. Rogers testified. Famous for Senator Pastore's flinty demeanor breaking down over six minutes until, under Mr. Rogers's soft-as-fleece assault, Pastore gives in.

(Okay, sure, it's dry. It's Mr. Rogers testifying. But watch it. It shows people can be rational and good.)