Friday, March 2, 2012

"I attempted to draw the sexiest babes I could, but they came out looking absurd."

So said Theodor Geisel--better known as Dr. Seuss, who would've turned 108 years old today.

In 1939, after leaving publisher Vanguard for Random House, Seuss told his new publisher he wanted to distribute an "adult" book first. "Adult" is put into quotes because it's hard to call something adult when it's technically a comic, of which every naked character is lacking nipples.

Nonetheless, released it was. The Seven Lady Godivas: The True Facts Concerning History's Barest Family came out in 1939, and was an immediate flop. Out of 10,000 copies printed, only 2,500 sold.

Why was it a flop? Well, the drawings looked exactly like how you'd expect Dr. Seuss to draw them. Picture the Cat in the Hat as a bodice-ripping hunk, and you sort of see where it gets odd. Judge for yourself, as here's one of the drawings from the book:


Those, my friends, are "the sexiest babes" Dr. Seuss could think of. I'm pretty certain the middle one plays linebacker for the Patriots. The one on the right might be Voltaire. And the white haired one has a striking resemblance to nearly everyone's grandma. If you think your grandma is a smoke show, well, good luck to you.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going try my best to read The Lorax without pretending it's really Wilford Brimley in the nude.


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