Librarian tracked down a list of books that inspired Kobe Bryant. It's only 75% predictable.

If you're a sports fan, you couldn't look for sports scores or stories in the past week without trudging through a media funeral procession for Kobe Bryant. The platitudes...the praise...the scandals...etc., etc., etc. It has been a public performance of artful misery to show you're dutifully depressed. A Sylvia Plath poem is a speedball of cheeriness by comparison.

Luckily, there's the Los Angeles Public Library offering a lighter take!

Keith Kesler, the social media librarian for the institution, searched through public interviews and social media posts for any literary mentions that the basketball superstar uttered. From that, Kesler cultivated a list.

The books Kobe read include:

“The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho
 
“The Illustrated Art of War” Sun Tzu

“Blink” and “The Tipping Point” by Malcolm Gladwell

“Children of Blood and Bone” Tomi Adeymi

“The Hero’s Journey” Joseph Campbell

“Jonathan Livingston Seagull” Richard Bach

“Lone Survivor” Marcus Luttrell

“Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable” by trainer Tim Grover

“Shoe Dog: A Memoir by the Creator of Nike” Phil Knight

“The Silver Linings Playbook” by Matthew Quick

“Sunny” Jason Reynolds

“Team of Rivals: The Political Genius of Abraham Lincoln” by Doris Kearns Goodwin

“Thirty Rooms to Hide In” Luke Sullivan

“Tuff Juice” by former NBA player Caron Butler

Look at Malcolm Gladwell with two books! And Doris Kearns Goodwin gets a shoutout!

I have to admit. I didn't think I'd ever mention Kobe Bryant and Doris Kearns Goodwin in the same sentence during my lifetime. Yet, here we are.

Kobe Bryant retires with a poem, enjoys stealing socks.

Thumbs-up if you love socks!

As a Celtics fan, I remember when Larry Bird retired, announcing it with a series of obscure haikus that combined the allure of caterpillar mustaches and 1980s short-shorts.

And Bill Russell! That scamp! When he called it a career he sent out a press release in iambic pentameter, full of floral imagery.

Which brings us to the Los Angeles Lakers' Kobe Bryant, who announced his retirement yesterday via a poem he wrote.

Some highlights:

Dear Basketball,

From the moment
I started rolling my dad’s tube socks
And shooting imaginary
Game-winning shots
In the Great Western Forum
I knew one thing was real:

I fell in love with you.

A love so deep I gave you my all —
From my mind & body
To my spirit & soul.

Ampersands! The spaghetti lovechild of a conjunction and the word 'and.' And Bryant lets his inner-Emily Dickinson out with the em-dash. Bonus points.

And we both know, no matter what I do next
I’ll always be that kid
With the rolled up socks
Garbage can in the corner
:05 seconds on the clock
Ball in my hands.
5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1

Poor dad. His multi-millionaire 37-year old son won't stop stealing his tube socks. Won't someone please buy Kobe a six-pack of socks for Christmas?