Saturday Morning PSA of The Week: Snitchin' in the suburbs!

Today's public service announcements are all information and no imagination--but yesteryear's? Those were full of drama, plot lines, and cameos from B-grade celebrities, all wedged into one minute of absolute fantasticness.

Consider this a trip back in time to when PSAs were sometimes worth watching more than the Saturday morning cartoons.


Today:  Grandma's lurking in the shadows.





Random Thoughts and Questions:
1.)  Who knew Hartford was such a hotbed for criminal activity? Next thing you know, McGruff will say Sioux Falls is overrun by the Sicilian mob.
2.)  If McGruff sees all this crime, why doesn't HE call it in?
3.)  You're telling me that Mimi here has such keen eyesight to make out a van's license plate a couple hundred feet away?
4.)  How did the criminals not see Mimi and Albert's gigantic walkie-talkies from three blocks away? It's like a 20ft antenna strapped to a 10lb brick.
5.)  Isn't "neighborhood watch" just another way of saying "nosy neighbor"?

Mark Twain's old farmhouse is up for sale.

Great news for the two or three people in the world pining to live in rural Connecticut, as Mark Twain's old farmhouse is up for sale for the low-low asking price of $1.85 million.

Lest you think you're getting some shack with some name recognition, the house was gutted in 2013 by its current owners and updated throughout. According to the real estate listing, the property showcases a "[s]tunning new designer kitchen with Cream Marfil marble counters, custom cabinetry" along with "Gaggenau premium appliances."

If you're scratching your head at what "Cream Marfil" is--as I was--it's apparently just the Spanish word for ivory. (Yes, my Spanish needs work.) And if you're wondering what "Gaggenau premium appliances" cost, well, roughly your entire checking account and your personal modesty.

The listing also notes Twain's estate now has "Carlisle hickory signature floors, antiqued ceiling beams, stone bridges, a projection screen, art room, barn, and a "gunite swimming pool."

If you're scratching your head again at what a "gunite swimming pool" is--as I was--it's apparently just a form of concrete. (Yes, my real estate-to-English translation skills need work, too.) And if you're wondering what "Carlisle hickory signature floors" go for, well, roughly two years worth of your retirement savings and all human decency.

The estate was bought by Twain for his daughter Jean back in 1909, in what I assume to be the most lavish way to tell your adult child they're still loved. Jean didn't enjoy the property for long, as she was found dead in a bathtub from a heart attack on Christmas Eve the same year. She was 29-years old.

Shockingly, the real estate listing skips over the info on Jean's death. Mortality doesn't really wow prospective buyers like gunite swimming pools and Marfil countertops apparently.

White privileged people are uncomfortable talking about being white privileged people.

"That would upset me very much. I wouldn't go there."

So said one Westport, CT, resident to the Associated Press regarding an essay topic asking local students their thoughts on white privilege, a topic that is frustrating many residents.

The essay topic is one many Americans are troubled with acknowledging-- race and wealth. Americans are uncomfortable with the topic because, on some level, many judge one another based on easy qualifiers like wealth and race, too, yet they don't want to be judged in turn on such simplistic metrics.

Westport is beautiful, quaint, charming, and enveloped in money. For local populations between 20,000-60,000, Westport is noted as one of the United States' ten wealthiest communities. It's ranked fifth in the nation for median family income, with median home prices of $1,200,000. And the town is also 93% white.

These aren't flaws or problems. Repeat: These are not flaws. There is nothing wrong. These are simply facts.

Westport is wealthy and predominantly white--which led to a creation from the city of a diversity council a decade ago called TEAM Westport, which sought to increase the diversity and appeal of the community to a broader spectrum of people. Part of that involved asking local students this year what white privilege entailed in their lives.

That's all. The essay question simply asks for self-awareness.

It hasn't gone well.

"There's a lot more controversy around it than many of us expected," said Harold Bailey Jr., a retired IBM vice president who is black and chairs the diversity council. "Just the fact it says 'white' and 'privilege,' for some people that's all they need to see, and all of a sudden we're race-baiting or trying to get people to feel guilty. That's not at all what it's about."

Longtime resident Bari Reiner disagrees. "It's an open town," she said. "There are no barricades here. Nobody says if you're black or whatever, you can't move here."

Reiner--and others--seem to misunderstand nuance. The question asked what it simply meant to be white and wealthy, and the benefits inherent in that combination, which Reiner and 93% of her fellow residents are. It is, again, a matter of self-awareness.

Right now, reading comprehension awareness about what the essay question actually asks would be an huge advancement.