Randomness Corner: Rogue Ferret Terrorizes Elderly Scooter Driver

The inevitable ferret reign of terror has begun, and they've decided to attack our most vulnerable humans: grannies.

Florence Taylor, an 86-year old resident of Nottinghamshire, England, was riding home recently from the local shops using her mobility scooter. Suddenly, Taylor says, a rogue ferret ran out of some nearby bushes and jumped onto her ride. A potential scooter-jacking was at hand.

Here's a photo of Taylor in her miniature, plasticized, pope mobile:

Taylor claims the ferret immediately clung to her leg--beginning a bloody showdown that would last 10-minutes. Realizing Taylor was a stubborn granny, the 2ft terror sunk his teeth into Taylor's heal, refusing to release his death grip despite the grandmother's repeated battering with her walking stick.

The ferocious ferret only gave up once it saw neighbors coming to save Taylor from certain doom, and scurried out of sight. Taylor was left with a bloody ankle, which required bandages and a tetanus shot from a local hospital.

The fright isn't over though. As Taylor told the UK's The Mirror, "It needs catching before it attacks again."

And as she told the UK's The Sun, "I’m too scared to even leave my home in case it attacks me again, after all IT'S GOT A TASTE FOR MY BLOOD NOW.”

Damn straight. Everyone knows once a ferret has a taste of your blood it's only a matter of time before it eats a limb clean off your body.

And so the ferret reign of terror begins.



photo: The Mirror