Glorified daycare (a.k.a. preschool) in Manhattan has become a wannabe caste system say experts, where the wealthiest of locals have taken the admittance of their 2-year old to private preschools as intensely as college applications.
"It was totally insane, but I live here, and I had to accept that it's part of the system if I wanted to send Zee to a private school," Canadian writer Judy Batalion tells CNN Money, apparently unaware how totally insane she sounds.
Indeed, CNN dives down the rabbit hole of private preschool in Manhattan, detailing a world of private school admissions consultants who charge $15,000-$30,000, tuitions up to $40,000, and parents requesting letters of recommendation from former President Bill Clinton, and one asking for the same from the Pope.
Says one adviser, "I've seen people tell the school they're Navaho (sic), when they're like 1/36th," she said. "It's a nuthouse."
Damn straight. Everyone knows to claim you're Cherokee first.
How would Clinton or the Pope write a letter of recommendation for a 2-year old? Where would they start? "This toddler has fine-tuned their motor skills to eat birthday cake like most 3-year olds--even better than some 4-year olds." Or "I was amazed at this toddler's ability to nap on cue like a narcoleptic on Ambien." Where, for example, would the Pope go with such a letter? Would he suggest Jesus recommends the toddler, too? "I think it's safe to say Jesus knows everything, and even Jesus knows this toddler was meant for this preschool."
By the way, apparently the Pope never answered that request. Because, you know, the Pope isn't insane.
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