NYU business student has the humility part down cold.

An anonymous student from NYU (the school where all the Columbia rejects go) sent out cover letters to a wide array of banking corporations for a summer analyst position. It's apparently a big deal to these future crooks in the banking industry to attain such a position for business majors.

Except this guy was, uhhh, humble. As in Sex Panther Cologne kind of humble.

Let's go to the cover letter demureness:

I am an ambitious undergraduate at NYU...I am punctual, personable, and shrewd individual, yet I have a quality which I pride myself on more than any of these.

I am unequivocally the most unflaggingly hard worker I know, and I love self-improvement.

HUMBLE! The dude is the Gandhi of the business world! How can he be without a summer analyst position?

Tell me more:

I left [a previous employer] because it was too easy. Once I realized I could achieve a perfect GPA while holding a part-time job at NYU, I decided to redouble my effort by placing out of two classes, taking two honors classes, and holding two part-time jobs. That semester I achieved a 3.93, and in the same time I managed to bench double my bodyweight and do 35 pull-ups.

Have you seen his pecs?? They're amazing! And don't even mention his glutes, man--they're chunks of marble carved by Michaelangelo himself! Have you tried doing 35 pull-ups? Only a sex beast can do 35 pull-ups.

I say these things only because solid evidence is more convincing than unverifiable statements, and I want to demonstrate that I am a hard worker.

Damn right. Saying your body is shredded is an undeniable fact. Have you seen his abs yet? Have you seen them? No really, you can't deny their magnificence. He's a hard worker.

I am proficient with Bloomberg terminals, excellent with excel, and can perform basic office functions with terrifying efficiency.

Have you seen the man make coffee? You've never been terrified until you've seen him operate a Keurig.

Please realize that I am not a braggart or conceited, I just want to outline my usefulness. Egos can be a huge liability, and I try not to have one.

It's not cockiness when you've got glutes and copy machine skills like he has.