Phillips Andover Academy has its own sanctioned hip-hop song.

In other news, hip-hop passed away last week after a long battle with lameness. It was 32 years old.

Yeah, it seems the Buffy and Giles crowd over at Phillips Andover Academy made a hip-hop video. Somewhere, Tupac is wondering where it all went so horribly wrong.

I made it to about 1:30 in the video before the throbbing in my head was too much. Having Abercrombie & Fitch rejects tell us how down-to-earth and normal they are gave me indigestion on par with eating bad chorizo.

"Coming to Andover basically enlightened me!" raps one young woman at around 1:10. As my grandmother would say, if you need to tell someone you're enlightened, you're probably not enlightened.

At 1:20, some middle-aged teacher at the school starts dropping beats and knowledge--and that's when I knew rap and hip-hop officially had been laid to rest. In lieu of flowers, please make a donation to the Red Cross.

Best/worst part: the comments on the Youtube page. One person says "It gave me chills."

((rubs temples furiously)) Can't pretentious rich people just stick to country clubs and ruining the economy?